Friends…Kittens, Writers, Readers, Sexy Man-imales and Fro-yo Outback Safari Locations Specializing in Disease,
I have been trying to keep in touch with the authors, blog tour promoters and kind folks who just hang around to tell me I have a way with words–for the last four and half months while I have been sick and trying as hard as I can to get through day to day things regarding All The Things Inbetween. Everyone has been exceptionally understanding when I’ve been delayed, worked backwards, when my tentatives became complete unreliability and everyone accepted my many apologies like champs. Thank you. I appreciate your understanding and compassion. And effin’ hell, I’m sorry.
This is my full disclosure post. It is midway through April and the doctors I’ve seen have sucked more blood out of me than Elizabeth Báthory ever bathed in and finally after months of mystery and numerous fictional sleuths (Jessica Fletcher, Sherlock Holmes, Miss Marple, Philip Marlowe, Jim Rockford, Inspector Clouseau, Colombo, and Ellery Queen) trying to figure out what my ailment is I got my first positive test. I am having baby lyme diseases! Or at the very least I have lyme disease and I have no clue at all as to whether or not I will be the mother to offspring of more. I actually know when I contracted it and where. At a fro-yo in Mission Valley–San Diego celebrating my pre-birthday, October 4, 2012. You wouldn’t think ticks would get you in SoCal or in the wilds of a fro-yo, but yes, Virginia, there seems to be a tick population in a fro-yo place that has not been previously reported. Buyer beware.
Because doctors in San Diego don’t see such things the two doctors I saw for this never caught what it was and I got nothing more than a topical antibiotic and told to take Benadryl. Long time untreated lyme disease is the shit and it really effs you in the A and that is why I’m so sick and getting worse. Having had this and it playing pinball with all of my different inside parts has made my inside parts sad. You can send happy feelings to Ali’s head, back, stomach, legs, chest, neck, skin, internal organs, mental state, and fingers dot holy kittens does this hurt.
I will not stop doing All The Things Inbetween or stop doing reviews. I can read amazekittens but my reviews are slow to come. SLOW. I sometimes write them and have them backed up because the part of collecting links and proofreading is tiring. I am doing my best, but my best is pretty negligible these days. I will also admit during my full disclosure that in the last two weeks I’ve begun pleasure reading because when you feel like hell it comes to a point where you just start looking for comfort rather than fulfilling commitments.
I’ve played with the idea of contacting authors that I’ve worked with in the past to help me do things that take some burden off my shoulders by coming up with creative solutions to add content to my site that isn’t so intensive for me. By creative solutions I’m talking about having an author who has a character who was known for baking to write a recipe. If someone wants to do their own interview of another author I would kiss them. I know it’s rude to ask favors… but it’s quite possible that having lyme disease will transform my cells and make me become a shifter, a vampire, or possibly lower my immunity to make me susceptible to viruses that will turn me into a zombie; probably a chocolate or sorbet eating zombie. Absolutely worse case scenario will be that I become a Republican–I don’t know what in God’s name I would do if that happened.
What better time to lean on friends to help me than when I have a disease that I contracted at a frozen yogurt place where animals are not known to tread; developed a disease that “she added to de coconut and she drank dem bot upped”? –That one is gonna stump a crap load of people. The truth is I’m possibly going to become a monster–or worse a Republican and I need you… please put on your super hero underoos and do it for the good of literary blah, blah, blah… The world will be a better place for it. And I am sure having me indebted to you will somehow work out for you in the end because I like naming kittens after people.
If you would like to help me personally… I’m accepting donations of kitten pictures at my Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter and email. I’m looking for friends on Bingo Blitz, because caring is sharing. And I would love feelies, good vibes and prayers. Positive in is positive out. <3
Ms. Ali (aka Mighty Online Empress–thanks Cece Osgood)
PS… I forgot! Send Chocolate, Coffee and Tylenol or the family with the collicky baby, opera singing man, annoying drum playing child who pounds way too loudly on the skins and the woman who allows all that ruckus to happen, gets it! I swear it… I will have my mom send me the same make slingshot she kills rodents with and I will start popping the neighbors in the kneecaps, asses and earlobes. My mom taught me how to aim and I will not miss.